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Lies and self-love

Gaia birthed us, in her image, as perfect beings. As beings in process, however, we encounter trauma. Trauma knocks us out of our perfection into untruth. Trauma itself comes from a lie, so it’s no surprise that it causes us to be out of integrity with ourselves. One of the ways trauma expresses itself is that we then lie to ourselves and/or to each other.

In order to start telling the truth, and heal our trauma, we only have to apply love. Foremost, self-love. Because when we go inside and love our inner child and love exactly what’s true for us, we are loving ourselves as Gaia birthed us. By extension, we are also loving Gaia. When we love ourselves as we truly are, we create the conditions for the most beautiful dreaming of Gaia to be expressed in the world, as she truly is.

Addiction is an attempt to love ourselves. The thing we crave (and lie for)—be it alcohol, food, caffeine, sex, tech—is an approximation of love. But it is not love. It is a lie.

The deep human needs that we replace in the modern world with addictions can be met by community. Especially the kind of community created in places like Tamera. But most of us don’t have access to that kind of community and it makes me wonder why we, as a culture, have chosen to pursue this line of questioning. If we don’t have access to deep community, then how do we love and feel love reflected back to us?

For me, the answer has been by connecting with Gaia, by going hiking, by going to the ocean, by feeling the earth, and the rocks, and the mosses, and the trees, and the water, and the animals all around me. I feel so loved when I go into the woods. And the conversations I have with myself and the life all around me are so deeply nourishing. Partly because they happen in mystery. I hold a question or a problem in my mind and, as I walk, the answers come. They steal into my psyche like tendrils and breezes and mini stumbles that remind me that I can not fall. That if I do fall, however I land, I will still be loved.

Being able to feel the love of Gaia often requires trauma repair. For this, the Inner Child Meditation is the most useful tool I’ve found. It’s simplicity is equal to its profundity.

The Inner Child Meditation:

When you open your eyes in the morning, stay in bed. Lie back and close your eyes again. Then, for one to three minutes only, just imagine your inner child. Call to your inner child and try to see her/him/them in your mind’s eye. Notice how she appears. What is she wearing? Ask her what she has to say and then just listen to whatever she says without cutting her off, without judgment. Just listen. And when she is done, love her up. Imagine yourself cuddling or hugging her and letting her know that you love her and that you are an adult now and you are here for her. That’s it.

If at first you have trouble ‘seeing’ her, just keep at it. The key is your consistency, not the some form of tangible results.

Categories: Uncategorized

Stella Osorojos Eisenstein, L.Ac.

Stella Osorojos Eisenstein, L.Ac., is a writer and acupuncturist who collects healing stories.

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